The source of joy

Such strange is human psychology. Source of his happiness and misery are outwardly focussed. If he is alone then he is unhappy being alone while being with other means being in conflict with other’s interest. What are reasons for this?
There is was a boy. He was not good enough in his study. He hardly could pass his examinations. That year he failed in his examination. He was very afraid of telling his result to his father.
He went to his grand mother and sought her advise. His grand mother given the solution. Then boy got confident and went to his meet his father.
When his father inquired him about the result, he started saying that he heard that once his grand father failed. On further inquiry the boy told his father regarding failures of his uncles and his father also.
Having seen this his father was little bit pacified. Then at last the boy conveyed the message of his failing in the exam. He was able to save himself from anger of his father.
Happiness and grief is merely a relative term. It is a matter of surprise that a man is not happy because of himself or not sorry because of himself. He always looks outward in deriving the pleasure or misery.
When some body is in grief, we feel empathy with him. Often some thing wrong happen to our relative or neighbors, we often go there and show our togetherness. But somewhere deep inside there is feeling of joy.
There is some sense of satisfaction that you are saved from the misfortune, the other one is under going. While sympathising other one, one boost his own ego.
What a irony? There is joy when some other one is in agony? It’s look so strange. If your friend gets lower marks in the examination, you always feel pity with him. If someone’s friends gets more marks, it is always a matter of jealousy and grief.
It is because man’s focus is towards the world. His sense of satisfaction is always relative. It’s based on comparative analysis of his own pleasure with his relative.
There is another story. There was one poor person in a village. He kept on worshiping God for long period of time. Being satisfied of his devotion agreed to grant him boon. But the condition was that whatever he would desire, his neighbors would get double of it. Poor man was in haste. He was in haste and accepted the boon without a second chance.
In the morning, he desired for beautiful house. Soon he was there in a beautiful house. He exclaimed. But as soon as he came out of his house, he found that all of his neighbors were gifted with two houses. He was shocked to see.
To whom he could flaunt his richness. How he could reflect that he was no more poor. At last he asked that he would turn blind with one eye and the result was that all of his neighbors turned blind with both eyes. But he was happy that he was half blind but all of his neighbors were completely blind.
Such is nature of human. What a strange inconsistency. Man gets pleasure when one of his known gets through adverse condition in his life. This provide a man an opportunity to sympathize with him, to pity with him, there by deriving pleasure from such pseudo empathy.
While if some ones relative or neighbors gets better place, its always an alarming condition. A man can not digest success of his competitor so easily. This is the reason why a man can not live alone. Being alone one be totally at ease with himself. But it is a known fact that whenever a man is in solitude, he is most disturbed.
To whom he could share his happiness or misery. Who would be cause of his joy and grief. After all some one is needed to compete, to compare. No body is going to teach , except the life itself.
This is one of the great vice that one should learn to avoid. When your competitor does better, it means he has certainly adopted some method, which is better for yielding better result. Instead of appreciating competitor success, one starts getting panicking. One keep on distancing oneself from the competitor after getting engulfed with negative emotion of jealousy and anger. This is not the way of life.
Instead One should learn art of discovering happiness in others achievement. Its not an easy task at all. When praise some one at his success, you learn to be humble, you learn to recognize enough that some better measure is required to be taken for achieving better result. Most importantly one becomes open to learn some thing form some one , who is better than you at some point of life.
Instead of deriving pleasure in other’s grief, one should learn the art of celebrating the success of happiness. This is true source of inner happiness.